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Poppy and Me

I’ve had a hard time keeping up with the online world this week because my Grandpa passed away on Monday and it’s been a hard thing to deal with.  He had stomach cancer and had been fighting it for a while, but his body could not fight it any longer.   He was a wonderful man, and to the last day was still thinking about his true passion in life: Physics.

The sad part is that he never saw his life’s work finished (the tests on his inventions are still being done, I believe he held on as long as he could just to try to see the results) but the important thing is that he found his muse and lived for it every day of his life.  I guess that’s all we can hope for, to find our passion, and value our family.   It’s made me appreciate the people in my life who are close to me, and realize we have a finite time here, and to make the most of it.  I wasn’t going to post about it because it’s so personal, but if it makes someone call their grandpa and tell them they love him, this post was worth it.  :)

  • http://shallowthoughtsfromiowa.blogspot.com Maria in Iowa

    Beautiful photo, lovely tribute. My grampas are both in heaven, but I will call my children’s grampa and tell HIM we love him.

  • http://www.transmitreceive.se David Elfström Lilja

    It’s hard losing someone near and dear. I lost my sister in a car accident two years ago… I still think of here every single day. But I keep the happy memories and she will live on in my heart! Love and warmth!

  • Jemimus

    Sorry for your loss Felicia, you have an important message for all of us there.

  • Chris

    Thank you for taking the time to post this. You obviously care for your grandfather deeply. My grandfather lives on the other side of the world and this made me realize that it’s been a couple of years without any real contact. I will call him this weekend. Someday, when the pain is not so sharp, perhaps you will tell us more about him and his life. Thank you again.

  • Scott Nap

    Felicia-
    I lost my uncle to cancer of the throat when I was a freshman in high school. All the man ever wanted me to do was go into broadcasting or sports. The day I had my first radio show was the day he passed. Since then, I’ve worked as an announcer for a pro baseball team, served as a program director for a major radio station, broadcast all of the major sports, and have now moved on to doing film work.

    Not a day goes by where I don’t wonder what he’d think about where I’m at in life. But at the same time, I know he’s probably getting a kick out of the fact that I worked so hard to honor his memory. Your grandfather clearly left a marked impression on you- you’re part of his legacy. If you inspire other people to remember how important every day is…hell, even if you remind people to laugh when all they want to do is curl into a ball…that’s something he’d be proud of, I’m sure.

    Scott Nap

  • http://www.filmclick.com Courtney

    I’m sorry for your lost. My Granddad passed away a few weeks after my Grandmom did. It was very sad at the time, but now, it’s kind of sweet that they couldn’t live without each other.

    We’ll just have to celebrate their lives and what they contributed to ours.

  • http://www.chocablog.com/ Dom

    What a wonderful tribute and fabulous photo. Thank you so much for sharing it.

  • Mike N.

    Felicia, so sorry for your loss. Thank-you for choosing to share this personal event with us. It sounds like he had a wonderful life well spent, and your talent and beauty are part of his legacy. What a great picture of you two! It makes me smile. He must have been as proud of you as you are of him. Take care and be well.

  • http://www.superdawg.com Ben

    So sorry to hear about your Grandpa Felicia.

  • http://worldofhiglet.blogspot.com/ worldofhiglet

    Felicia, sorry to hear about your Grandpa. Thank you for sharing such a heart-felt post and wonderful picture of the two of you together. It’s good to know you have your family around and it is generous to prod others into appreciating what they have.

  • http://alsatia101.livejournal.com/ Dana

    I’m sorry about your Grandpa, and don’t think it’s at all too personal of a thing for you to have posted. At least, so long as you’re comfortable with people knowing about it, then that’s what I think is important.

    I haven’t got any grandparents to call, but am definitely telling other relatives that I love them.

  • Lisa

    Felicia,

    Thank you so much for sharing this personal message with your fans and friends. One of my grandfathers passed away a couple of years ago it was a really sad time for my family and I. I still can’t listen to any of the songs from his funeral without tearing up and missing him intensely.

    I hope you can find peace in the good memories you have of him and the obvious influence he had on your life. My thoughts are with you and your family!

  • http://blog.jenwriter.com Jen

    Oh, I’m so sorry. I know that must be rough. It’s a beautiful picture of the two of you, and what you said made me all sappy. I need to take trip to visit my Grandma.

  • http://michaeljohnson0664.blogspot.com/ Michael Johnson

    My deepest condolences to you. I lost both of my grandfathers in the late 1990′s, then one of my grandmothers 5 years ago, so I know how you feel. I’m glad your grandfather was able to keep doing what he loved. Not all of us get that opportunity! You are continuing his legacy by sharing your gifts with the world, just as he did.

  • Virginia

    I’m sorry for your loss, and while I’m not really good with emotions and stuff, would it be too much to ask for more details about your grandpa’s inventions, like where I might read up on them? As a science geek it’s always terrible to know a great mind has passed, and again I’m sorry and I hope you and your family are doing ok.

  • Paul

    I’m sorry for your loss, Felicia. :( Requiescat in pace, Grandpa.

  • http://www.feliciaday.net Felicia

    Thanks so much you guys, I really appreciate the words, and hearing about your own stories, it definitely gives me a feeling of community that is most appreciated during this time.

    His name was Thomas Gill Miller. He did stuff with neutron detection or something. I’m not sure on the details, I tried to take Physics 3 times in college, and never stuck with it, haha. I took Tensor Analysis for my math degree for him though! :)

  • soma
  • tngregory

    how wonderful of you to share this and inspire your readers with your grandfather’s passion. what better way to celebrate a life!

  • jorndorff

    I’m so sorry to hear about your grandfather. Please accept deepest sympathies from this kind stranger and fan.

  • Tyler

    I actually never knew either of my grandfathers, but had an awesome step-grandfather that I wish I knew better before he passed away. I think about him and my grandmother (who he joined about a year after she passed) and it makes me sad and happy at the same time, because I know they aren’t suffering anymore (grandmother had lung cancer, and Ray a broken heart.)

    Thank you for posting about this… you seem like a really great person and I’m glad you had your grandfather for so long into your life.

  • Carrie

    Felicia,
    I’m sorry for your loss.

  • mathieu

    137

  • Michael in Milwaukee

    Thank you for sharing what your grandfather meant to you. You are brave to do this.
    My grandpa died the week before Christmas last year. Between his death and Christmas Eve, I kicked myself into high gear to finish a draft of my novel, which I’d been writing for several years and which has been my outlet for and source of my passion–whenever I write, I feel I am truest to myself. It’s bittersweet how death of one we love can focus the lives of the living. But, in at least a small way, the reminder of my own mortality and the emotionality of my grandpa’s loss really drove me to complete something so important to my life, and hopefully eventually to others. And so I will always remember my grandpa when I think of my novel and that final push, finishing in the early morning hours of Christmas Eve. It was one of the most sublime moments I can recall, following a surreal week.
    I hope you may be similarly moved in celebration of life during this difficult but powerful time.

  • http://tracee.org Tracee

    I’m so sorry to hear about your grandfather. Thank you for your post, not only does it remind people to tell the people they love just that, it also reminds us, that while you are a talented actress, geek and celebrity blogger, you are also human and need time off from your online life to be just that.

    My sincere condolences.

  • Cameron (BreakAtmo)

    Best wishes, Felicia. I hope your grandfather’s inventions turn out well, and that the grieving process isn’t too rough. Good luck.

  • Max

    Condolences Felicia.

    That post actually inspired me to work even harder on my physics. Thank you.

  • Formaldehyde

    I’m so sorry to hear that Felicia, he sounds like a great guy.

    I hope his work turns out to be everything he ever wanted it to be.

  • http://www.strangewindx.blogspot.com Xdpaul

    Thank you. It is wonderful to hear of a man who spent his life throwing his talents wholeheartedly into the service of others. May your grief be full and the bonds of friendship and family grow stronger.

  • Chris

    I am sorry for your loss. I hope your heart heals quickly. I am sure you make him proud.

  • Salk

    Have a good cry and think about all the good memories when you do so.

  • http://www.invisiblediner.com Andy

    Felicia,

    Thank you for this post. Your comments are touching and they have inspired me to “jump start” my life a bit. Especially your comment “… realize we have a finite time here, and to make the
    most of it.”

    My thoughts are with you.

  • http://flipside.kintiko.net/ FlipSide

    Thanks for sharing with us. I hope we can somehow make things better for you.

  • edgar

    Felicia,

    Losing a loved one sure is tough. I lost two of my grandparents a year apart from both sides several years ago.

    My remaining grandfather was recently ill and thankfully pulled through, but its left him weaker. I’ve been thinking about him and my grandmother more of late and even more-so now.

    Thank you for sharing this sad personal post with us. It will definitely do some good.

  • http://brianrubin.livejournal.com Brian Rubin

    Oh my god, I’m so sorry. Please accept my deepest condolences in this time of loss and grief.

  • http://fordmadoxfraud.livejournal.com Ford MF

    Wow, that sucks kiddo. I’m sorry.

  • Andrew

    *hugs*

    I’ve lost all my Grandparents and a couple of Uncles. My Uncle dying last year kick started me a lot, sorting myself out a lot more and going for things I really wanted to do rather than thinking I’d get round to doing them at some point later on.

  • Linnea

    I’m so sorry about your grandpa; I remember how hard it was. It is great he could continue doing what he loved. Thanks for sharing your story with us.

  • http://www.markzabala.com Mark Zabala

    *love and hugs*

  • jess

    /hug

    Thoughts and Prayers kiddo

  • dylan

    Felicia, I am so sorry for your loss. I can relate. A while back, my grandfather had stomach cancer as well, and it killed me when the good lord took him from my family and me. He, much like your grandfather, had a passion. Though, instead of physics, his was automotives. Even though I was young when he died, I can still remember the great man that he was. Hang in there, and know that, given time, everything will be ok.

  • aug

    Felicia,

    Sorry for your loss. It’s been a while since my grandparents passed away but I still treasure the memories I have of them. When you feel down think of all the good memories and you can’t help but smile.
    Take care.
    aug

  • Ingrid

    Felicia,

    I’m so sorry for your loss. But I would also like to thank you for your truly inspiring post.

  • http://paularte-talvez.blogspot.com Paula

    I’m sorry for your loss. Beautiful post.
    Death is a part of life and besides the pain, it will always bring us something great.
    Like love or realizing that we are capable of great things.

    We are the voice of those who have gone and live in our hearts.

    Hugs Felicia :)

  • http://rickdumont.net Rick Dumont

    What a wonderful post. Your Grandpa would be proud. Thanks Felicia.

    Rick

  • http://farnorthblog.blogspot.com teflonjedi

    Felicia, I’m sorry to read of your loss. It’s great that you have such fond thoughts of your grandfather…something I’m sure you’ll carry with you all your days.

  • QuoterGal

    I’m so sorry, Felicia… it’s so hard. I’ve lost all my grandparents over the years, and more recently my parents… but I will call my sisters after your painful reminder.

    Take care, and don’t be afraid to grieve… it feels like crap, but it helps in the long run… and so do all of the good memories.

    “Sorrow makes us all children again – destroys all differences of intellect. The wisest know nothing.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

  • http://journals.aol.com/tkelliher617/Isittheweekendyet/ Tabatha

    Hi Felicia,
    So sorry to hear about you losing your Grandp. I lost mine was I was 18 (22 yrs ago) and I miss him very much we had a special bond as Im sure you did too. My prayers are with you.

  • Lee

    Oh, I’m so sorry. I lost my best friend to leukemia last year. But it sounds like your granddad had a pretty amazing life. Inventing stuff, advancing the march of progress for humanity, that’s pretty great stuff to do with a life. Some folks just do work for other people and never really get to *create*. So it sounds like his was a wonderful and worthy life indeed.

    And thanks to your encouraging words, I’m gonna go visit my grandparents tomorrow. :)

  • dparr

    Felicia,

    Your granddad was lucky to have found his “calling” in life and to have had a granddaughter who loved him.

    Pursue your calling with as much gusto.

    Appreciate the people who love you.

    And please keep in touch.

  • Peter

    Felicia,

    Please accept my condolences on your loss.

    I know what you’re going through having been there myself on more than one occasion.

    Your grandfather seems to have been able to pursue his dream in the real world. Few have that chance.

    Wish you the same.

  • http://tibits.diebiblyothek.eu Lydia

    Felicia, sorry to here about your loss. It reminds me of my grandfather. He died quite a while ago (1979). But I still think about him from time to time, as he was the dearest friend I had in my life. Tears help a bit, sometimes.
    :-)

    *hugs* Ly

  • http://misapplied.blogdrive.com curtinparloe

    I’m sorry to hear of your loss.

  • http://metavitae.com Will

    Condolences to you and your family, Fe.
    It sounds like he was a cool guy.

  • Bryy

    Felicia,
    So very sorry to hear about your loss. At least he died doing what he loved, and seeing one of his projects in action.

  • Jonnythshirt

    I never knew either of my grandpa’s, and my only grandma I knew was a bit grumpy, but hey she was from Donegal and had a hard enough life, but she had a good heart too. She had a big ‘ol wart on the end of her nose which she used to say kept her company, that always made me laugh. Best wishes for you and your family at this time Felicia. A full life, with purpose and a family to be proud I’d say is more than a man could hope for, and it definately seems your grandpa had that, in spades.

  • http://www.carlyandandy.com/andy/ Andrew

    While most all of my grandparents are gone (the one remaining will never die, she’ll take us all with her, first), I have nearly a dozen people in my life currently suffering some kind of cancer or similar disease. I am quite glad you shared this with us, and I hope you are full of happy memories that will pop up unexpectedly whenever you need them.

  • http://spensercoke.com Spenser

    As it’s been said 1000 times, I’m terribly sorry.

    1001 can’t hurt I suppose.

  • Mark

    Grandparents are the gate to the past
    A Gift of Knowledge
    And an answer to our future.

    I’m Happy that you were close to your Grandfather and I can honestly say I know how you feel, no one can ever replace that feeling when somebody has left your life but knowing they will always be part of your life you should always take comfort in Felicia.

  • Thad

    Sorry for your loss Felicia. I lost both of my Grandpas
    When I was in High School. I think about them always in my heart. And all my prayers go out to you.

  • Em

    I´m so sorry for your loss. My father died the same day as your grandfather. He had cancer too. You just have to remember the healthy person not the sick person at the end. That´s what I keep telling myself anyway.

    Lots of hugs to you and your family.

    /Em in Sweden

  • singmealullaby

    so sorry sweetie.

  • Lopekal

    Sorry to hear about your loss.

    That is a very beautiful photo of the pair of you.

    I lost my mum to cervical cancer a few years back, on the day before my birthday. It’s put a bit of a dampener on my birthday since but it taught me [in no uncertain terms] about the cycle of life.

    What my mum taught me, throughout her illness, is that no matter what, you just dont give up.

  • Tom G

    Great photo of you and Poppy Felicia. I can relate to your loss somewhat… my Grandma was *extra* special to me. I still think of her occasionally and her great outlook and appreciation of life for her entire 104yrs.

  • frijole

    Sorry to hear about your dad. Hope everything works out well.

  • frijole

    oops, grand-dad.

  • Corinne, Australia.

    Felicia, i’m sorry for your loss! Grandparents are very special and it’s hard watching someone elderly and beautiful pass away. I said goodbye to my grandma a short while back too. Remember the good times and what he passed onto you, that’s golden. thanks for sharing this touching moment. and yes, your post reminded me to call a family member i’d forgotten about. *hugs*

  • Michael Boeck

    Dear Felicia,
    Your post struck a chord with me. My grandfather was also a nuclear physicist that died of stomach cancer. He worked for Lawrence of Livermore Laboratory in California. He was the best person I’ve ever known, and was the inspiration for my current career (landscape architecture, not physics, but that’s another story). It’s wonderful that you had a great relationship with your grandfather, I’m sure he will live on in his work.
    Sincerely,
    Michael Boeck

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